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Jewelry

What a store! If you ask for a ring that costs less than $5000 – they look in the wastebasket.

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* The most expensive jewelry is the wedding ring. It’s already cost me $200 a month alimony.

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The best way to stop your wife from spending too much money on gloves is to buy her a new diamond ring.

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Joke

He who laughs last doesn’t get the joke.

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* If your wife laughs at your jokes, it means that you either have a good joke or a good wife.

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* If you can’t laugh at the jokes of this age, laugh at the age of these jokes.

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* The oldest joke I know is, when Eve asked Adam: “Do you love me?” and he replied: “Who else?”

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* Girls hate to hear jokes. I asked a girl to go for a walk with me in the woods and she said: “Don’t make me laugh!”

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* A joke is a form of humor enjoyed by some and misunderstood by most.

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* Don’t stop me if you have heard this joke. I want to hear it again.

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* I could tell you some more jokes, but what’s the use? You would only laugh at them.

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* He who laughs last usually has a tooth missing.

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* A wife laughs at her husband’s jokes not because they are clever but because she is.

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* I’m not going to stand here and tell you a lot of old stale jokes, but I’ll introduce the next speaker who will.

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Always laugh heartily about your boss’s jokes. He may be giving you a loyalty test.

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* A sense of humor is the ability to laugh at your own jokes when your wife tells them.

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* A good husband is one who laughs at his own jokes when his wife tells them.

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